Just Scribbles & Notes
I’m going to sum up all the sad, heartbreaking, depressing parts so we can get right to the celebration. In the year 2018 I had shoulder surgery that kept me off the football field. Also, my best friend passed away due to a rare form of cancer. All things considered, the absence of football wouldn’t be forever but Joe, my best friend, now that loss seemed endless. The world was attacking me and my survival instincts took over. Fight or Flight?
Uniquely, I did both. In this case, I moved to Los Angeles. Truly, I called my mother on the drive from Phoenix (where I was rehabbing my shoulder) with my car loaded up and on the move. Furthermore, I was fighting. Fighting to get up and train everyday, fighting to be social and do new things. More than anything, I fought to write. At first, just scribbles and notes on my iPhone.
Prison Or Passion
What started out as therapeutic jotting on my iPhone quickly turned into a 150 poem collection. Christopher Poindexter, a well known contemporary poet, reached out to me. Christopher wanted me to be his debut artist for his own publishing company. More than anything I was honored that someone who has had so much personal success thought my work needed to be read. Granted, my notes were not ready to be put to print right that moment. Working tirelessly I edited my poems, designed my own cover, and was instrumental in every part of the process. Every creative decision was either my own or finalized by me. Now it is April 1st and preorders for my book are on the way. It’s time to celebrate.
It’s important to realize, I am the first active NFL player to write a poetry book. Moreover, I play one of the toughest, hyper-masculine, sports in the world. Yet, here I am writing about my feelings, insecurities, hopes, and dreams. The example I wish I would have had growing up. Little boys aren’t taught how to express or communicate their feelings. Altogether, athletes up to adulthood are discouraged from showing a range of emotion.
This is not natural. I want everyone to know that they have a right to feel. I have been through things that many have gone through and somethings that people can only imagine. I want to share my story so people know they aren’t alone. We have the right to heal and love as our souls see fit. I hope you will take a look and make a decision for yourself. After all, I just want everyone to know they have a choice when it comes to emotions and expression.